# Thought you might like a laugh



## mtlogcabin (Dec 13, 2011)

> The IRS decides to audit Grandpa, and summons him to the IRS

> office..

> *

> *The IRS auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his

> attorney.

> 

> The auditor said, 'Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no

> full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money

> gambling.*

> *I'm not sure the IRS finds that believable..'*

> *I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it,' says Grandpa. 'How about a

> demonstration?'*

> *The auditor thinks for a moment and said, 'Okay. Go ahead.' *

> *Grandpa says, 'I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my

> own eye.'

> *

> *The auditor thinks a moment and says, 'It's a bet.'*

> *Grandpa removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditor's jaw drops.

> 

> Grandpa says, 'Now, I'll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite

> my

> other eye.'*

> *Now the auditor can tell Grandpa isn't blind, so he takes the bet.

> 

> Grandpa removes his dentures and bites his good eye.

> The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand,

> with

> Grandpa's attorney as a witness. He starts to get nervous.

> 

> 'Want to go double or nothing?' Grandpa asks 'I'll bet you six

> thousand

> dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that

> wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in

> between.'*

> *The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully

> and

> decides there's no way this old guy could possibly manage that stunt,

> so he

> agrees again.

> 

> Grandpa stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, but although he

> strains

> mightily, he can't make the stream reach the wastebasket on the other

> side,

> so he pretty much urinates all over the auditor's desk.*

> *The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a

> major loss

> into a huge win.*

> *But Grandpa's own attorney moans and puts his head in his hands.

> 

> Are you okay?' the auditor asks.

> 

> 'Not really,' says the attorney. 'This morning, when Grandpa told me

> he'd

> been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty-five thousand dollars

> that he

> could come in here and pee all over your desk and that you'd be happy

> about

> it!'*

> * Don't Mess with Old People!!*

>


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## Rider Rick (Dec 13, 2011)

Now that's a good one.


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## Mac (Dec 14, 2011)

"Old age and treachery will triumph over youth and inexperience"


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## JBI (Dec 14, 2011)

Literally LMAO!


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## fatboy (Dec 14, 2011)

Yeah, good one........


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## David Henderson (Dec 16, 2011)

now that's a gooder....


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## fatboy (Dec 16, 2011)

Well, in the spirit on the weekend........

*Tom  Brady, after living a full life, died. When he got to heaven, God was  showing him around. They came to a modest little house with a faded  Patriots flag in the window. "This house is yours for eternity Tom, said  God. "This is very special; not everyone gets a house up here." Tom  felt special, indeed, and walked up to his house. On his way up the  porch, he noticed another house just around the .........corner. It was a  huge 3-story mansion with Orange and Blue sidewalks and drive ways, a  50 foot tall flagpole with an enormous Broncos logo flag waving, a  swimming pool in shape of a horse, a Broncos logo in every window, and a  Tim Tebow jersey on the front door. Tom looked at God and said "God,  I'm not trying to be ungrateful, but I have a question. I was an all-pro  QB, I won 3 Super Bowls, and I even went to the Hall of Fame." God said  "So what's your point Tom?" "Well, why does Tim Tebow get a better  house than me?" God chuckled, and said "Tom, that's not Tim's house,  it's mine."*


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## Papio Bldg Dept (Dec 16, 2011)

Remind me not to leave the house after the Pats/Broncos game Sunday.  Would hate to be struck down by an angry and vengeful "fan."



			
				fatboy said:
			
		

> Well, in the spirit on the weekend........*Tom  Brady, after living a full life, died. When he got to heaven, God was  showing him around. They came to a modest little house with a faded  Patriots flag in the window. "This house is yours for eternity Tom, said  God. "This is very special; not everyone gets a house up here." Tom  felt special, indeed, and walked up to his house. On his way up the  porch, he noticed another house just around the .........corner. It was a  huge 3-story mansion with Orange and Blue sidewalks and drive ways, a  50 foot tall flagpole with an enormous Broncos logo flag waving, a  swimming pool in shape of a horse, a Broncos logo in every window, and a  Tim Tebow jersey on the front door. Tom looked at God and said "God,  I'm not trying to be ungrateful, but I have a question. I was an all-pro  QB, I won 3 Super Bowls, and I even went to the Hall of Fame." God said  "So what's your point Tom?" "Well, why does Tim Tebow get a better  house than me?" God chuckled, and said "Tom, that's not Tim's house,  it's mine."*


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## brudgers (Dec 16, 2011)

fatboy said:
			
		

> Well, in the spirit on the weekend........  *Tom  Brady, after living a full life, died. When he got to heaven, God was  showing him around. They came to a modest little house with a faded  Patriots flag in the window. "This house is yours for eternity Tom, said  God. "This is very special; not everyone gets a house up here." Tom  felt special, indeed, and walked up to his house. On his way up the  porch, he noticed another house just around the .........corner. It was a  huge 3-story mansion with Orange and Blue sidewalks and drive ways, a  50 foot tall flagpole with an enormous Broncos logo flag waving, a  swimming pool in shape of a horse, a Broncos logo in every window, and a  Tim Tebow jersey on the front door. Tom looked at God and said "God,  I'm not trying to be ungrateful, but I have a question. I was an all-pro  QB, I won 3 Super Bowls, and I even went to the Hall of Fame." God said  "So what's your point Tom?" "Well, why does Tim Tebow get a better  house than me?" God chuckled, and said "Tom, that's not Tim's house,  it's mine."*


  You heard the story wrong.  It's a Gator flag.


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## gbhammer (Dec 16, 2011)

I lived in Denver off and on for many years, and I was a huge fan of John Elway. I gotta love those Broncos. Tim Tebow has been one of my hero's since the super bowl add that he and his mom were bashed in.


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## mtlogcabin (Dec 16, 2011)

I am not a football fan but I do admire his character. I think he is a more positive role model for younger people to look up to then the vast majority of proffessional sports figures today.


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## gbhammer (Dec 16, 2011)

mtlogcabin said:
			
		

> I am not a football fan but I do admire his character. I think he is a more positive role model for younger people to look up to then the vast majority of proffessional sports figures today.


Yep    :agree

Could care less about sports these days (exception: I do care about darts, and yes it is a sport) and the reason is that many of the players are anything but good role models.


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